Chapter 54: The Ex-Boyfriend

Upon hearing those words, Lu Zhi Xi’s body suddenly stiffened.

At first, he didn’t immediately grasp the exact meaning behind Jiang Ying’s statement—did she mean she didn’t want the property, or something else?

Why?

They had gotten along so well during this time. Jiang Ying had already let down her guard against him, and there was no one like Yu Siyuan standing between them. Every night they would talk on the phone, and occasionally meet in person. He felt as though their relationship was on the verge of returning to how it had been when they were together before.

Just this morning, when he went out to pick Jiang Ying up, he had been full of joy, thinking this document might serve as the glue to mend their relationship.

The spring afternoon sunlight streamed gently through the clear windows, softly illuminating the sofa and the floor. Outside, willow catkins floated through the air, colder than falling snow.

“Zhi Xi?”

Jiang Ying noticed the unusually long silence and straightened up to look at Lu Zhi Xi.

He seemed lost in thought, only slowly coming back to himself when she spoke, returning her a gentle smile.

“I remember last year when I mistook the April catkins in Beijing for snow. We stayed home those days, didn’t go anywhere.”

Jiang Ying remembered well. Those were exactly the days when they had no classes and stayed home watching movies and playing games, sticking together like magnets.

Another April, another year of drifting catkins, and still the two of them.

But everything was different now.

Seeing that she gave no response, he returned to the earlier topic. “About the property, don’t rush to refuse me. You can at least look over the contents of the agreement.”

Jiang Ying candidly replied, “Zhi Xi, I know you want to put my mind at ease. But there’s so much of it I don’t even know what I’d do with it. And to be honest, I don’t understand the logic of your circle. Even if you dared to give it to me, I wouldn’t dare to accept it. It’s like an emperor telling a commoner, ‘Tomorrow, you’ll be the emperor.’ Do you think the commoner would be overjoyed or terrified out of their wits?”

“You don’t have to worry that there’s something wrong with these assets. I can arrange for a lawyer to explain each clause to you, and someone will manage the assets going forward. I’m not scheming against you, nor would I hurt you—you know that well.”

Seeing his insistence, Jiang Ying shook her head and said, “You should understand I’m not just talking about the agreement.”

Lu Zhi Xi’s expression faltered slightly. He asked again, “Are you still angry? Is it because I deleted you from the group chat? I was just very jealous. If you don’t like it, I can—”

He paused, forcing himself to finish the sentence: “...I promise I won’t do that again.”

He pursed his lips, his eyes full of reluctance, but his face trying hard to appear sincere.

It was the first time Jiang Ying had seen him wear such a reluctant, slightly childish expression, and her heavy heart suddenly lightened.

Her smile made Lu Zhi Xi think he had said the right thing, so he began listing all the things he had done lately.

“I shouldn’t have lashed out at Yu Siyuan because of jealousy.”

“I won’t pry into what happened when you were with Yu Siyuan anymore.”

“I won’t begrudge the gifts you gave him.”

“I’ll be nicer when I see Meng Shao in the future.”

…

He earnestly confessed each item, even recalling the time he secretly brought her roasted chestnuts and annoyed her, like a prisoner dragged into an interrogation room hoping the judge would show mercy for his confession.

Jiang Ying smiled and asked, “So you knew all along these things were wrong. Then why did you keep testing me before?”

Lu Zhi Xi lowered his eyes and fluttered his lashes. “Because I didn’t want you to focus your attention on someone else.”

---

Jiang Ying asked, “Were you happy when you did those things?”

Lu Zhi Xi fell silent.

He wasn’t happy when he punched Yu Siyuan.

Because he immediately saw Jiang Ying’s heartache as she checked Yu Siyuan’s injuries.

He wasn’t happy when he deleted her from the group chat.

Because even though he showed jealousy, Jiang Ying didn’t comfort him.

A favored child is forgiven for mistakes, cared for when crying, allowed to throw tantrums and be held until the one they care about softens and says helplessly, “Don’t do this again.”

With each excessive act, Lu Zhi Xi realized more deeply that she no longer showed him the same preference as before, yet he still believed she must have some feelings left for him.

“No matter what, our real problem isn’t about these things,” Jiang Ying said.

Lu Zhi Xi didn’t reply but instead asked if she wanted some juice. Before she could answer, he got up and busied himself in the kitchen.

Jiang Ying knew he was trying to change the subject again and didn’t stop him. She sat quietly on the sofa, gazing toward the kitchen.

Warm yellow spotlights fell on Lu Zhi Xi, gently tinting his soft, light-colored clothes with a mellow hue. He skillfully took out fruit, cut it, and pressed the juice.

Since their breakup, she had felt sadness, anger, and even fear when Lu Zhi Xi revealed his stubborn side, but that fear later transformed into a thrilling sense of danger.

Without Lu Zhi Xi, Jiang Ying didn’t know a person could feel such complicated emotions toward another.

Yet all these feelings, whether good or bad, melted into what she saw now—a calm affection, a bittersweet release.

She thought she might never forget this moment in her life.

After a while, Lu Zhi Xi brought the juice over and asked, “There’s still time. I’ll play games with you.”

Jiang Ying smiled, “Okay.”

Seeing she didn’t refuse, Lu Zhi Xi felt somewhat better and chose the game she played most often.

After inserting the disc, the screen quickly displayed the last failed attempt before their breakup.

“That was the day before we broke up,” Jiang Ying said lightly. “You said you’d help me pass the level, but the next day we broke up.”

Lu Zhi Xi, who had been sitting beside her, silently pulled her into his arms, pressed the controller buttons with a heavy voice, “I’ll help you reload the save and play again.”

She watched quietly as he played. Although Lu Zhi Xi wasn’t a gamer, he had occasionally taken the controller to help her clear levels and was more skilled than her, who had played hundreds of hours.

When he finished defeating the boss and saved the game, he handed the controller to her. Suddenly, Jiang Ying said, “I wish life had a save and reload function.”

“Let’s not talk about that, okay? Want to watch a movie?” he finally replied.

“No, Zhi Xi, I came to see you today just to talk about this.”

Jiang Ying guided the warrior in the game toward a new map.

“A life without save points can only move forward along the path. Because if you keep trying to look back, you’ll miss many other things you could experience and live through. What do you think?”

“That’s not true. I don’t want to experience anything else,” he said firmly.

Amid the lively, cheerful game music, Jiang Ying continued to move the warrior forward.

---

The widescreen TV briefly went black as the game entered a dungeon, reflecting Lu Zhi Xi embracing her from behind, silently resting his head on her shoulder.

Unlike his usual calm, composed demeanor, Lu Zhi Xi now looked desolate.

Jiang Ying softened her voice and finally returned to the topic Lu Zhi Xi had avoided.

“Our biggest problem was missing the right timing. Zhi Xi, I’m not blaming you. I’m not angry anymore, but that doesn’t mean I’ve forgiven what happened. But that’s how it is: once the timing is missed, everything goes wrong…”

Lu Zhi Xi felt a deep helplessness.

Was one breakup’s scar really this big? So vast that even giving everything to fix it wouldn’t be enough? Then what would be enough?

After nearly half a minute, he finally spoke: “Ying Ying, I can do anything. If you don’t want the property now, that’s fine. The agreement is always there, and you can sign it anytime. Whatever else you need, just tell me—I’ll do it.”

“Really?” Jiang Ying looked at him. “You’d do anything to make me happy?”

“Really.”

“Then let’s do as I say. You live your life, and I’ll live mine.”

Those words were like a fire, completely burning away Lu Zhi Xi’s reason.

He flipped her onto the sofa, ignoring everything to kiss her, tearing off her clothes, caressing her skin, trying to be closer to her.

“But I can’t leave you. I just want to be with you.”

He offered a pale defense of his feelings, as if convincing her, whispering persistently in her ear.

Jiang Ying softly said, “Besides me, you actually like other things. You like having fresh flowers at home, dipping fruit in cheese and honey, the cake at that Italian restaurant in the embassy district…”

She enumerated those little habits, unnoticed even by Lu Zhi Xi himself.

These mundane details struck his heart like a heavy hammer.

He gradually stopped his aggressive movements, lying still on top of her, silently burying his face in her neck.

Jiang Ying felt moisture on her shoulder.

She let him hold her, gently stroking his hair, her gaze fixed on the ceiling as she softly said, “Zhi Xi, when I first touched your hair, I thought you must have a good temper. The elders on my side say that children with soft hair are gentle and good-natured.”

“No, I’m not. I’m terrible,” his voice was hoarse.

“Were you pretending when you took care of me?”

“No, I wasn’t.”

“Do you feel happy because I’m happy?”

“...Yes.”

Jiang Ying smiled gently. “Then you are a gentle person. You care about me, right? If you return to your own life and stop trying to control me, you’ll feel lighter too.”

Lu Zhi Xi finally sat up.

His pale face was flushed around the eyes and nose, his eyes moist. Though his face showed no expression, his damp eyelashes revealed everything.