Chapter 116: Conspiracy

On the way to what was affectionately known as Kirito’s "Little Love Nest," Lancer happened to run into Sachi, who was out running errands.

"Hey there, Sachi!" Lancer was the first to greet her, even before Asuna, who was also a woman.

"Oh!" Sachi hadn't expected to run into an acquaintance. Turning around, she saw Lancer’s beaming face. "Lancer, long time no see."

"Don't be like that, Sachi, you know I don't like formalities," Lancer said, pulling a doll from his backpack and handing it to her. "This is the item you ordered last time. I figured since I was coming to see that guy Kirito anyway, I’d bring it along."

"That’s amazing!" Asuna hadn't realized such items existed in the game.

"Could you make one for me, too?" Asuna asked suddenly.

"No problem! Since we’re acquaintances, I’ll give you a fifty percent discount," Lancer said to Asuna with a sly grin.

"Half price? It seems you’re not afraid of being hunted down again, are you? Fine, in that case, when we get back later..." Asuna, seemingly having caught onto Lancer’s personality, countered immediately.

"Heh heh~" Just as Lancer was about to retort, a burst of laughter came from the side.

"Sorry, sorry, I just didn't expect you two to be so close," Sachi said, covering her mouth as she giggled.

"Who’s close with him/her?!" they both shouted in unison.

The two locked eyes for a second, then took a step back, adding, "Don't copy me!"

And so, with one of the three watching the other two play around, they slowly walked toward Kirito’s cabin. This area was free of high-level monsters, containing only ornamental creatures, which made it a popular resting spot for players who preferred to avoid the front lines. Kirito had paid a hefty sum—dumping his collection of rare items and signing numerous IOUs—to secure this plot of land, so those who frequently strolled through the area were quite familiar with Sachi.

"Hello, Uncle Bold."

"Haha, hello there~"

As Sachi continued to chat with the neighbors, Lancer observed his surroundings with curiosity. He didn't believe the property was so expensive simply because there were no aggressive monsters; any player wealthy enough to buy land here was certainly capable of ignoring the monsters on these lower floors.

***

When they arrived at Kirito and Sachi’s house, Lancer suddenly felt a flash of inspiration. "By the way, Sachi, what does Kirito do to pass the time when you're not home?"

"Huh? Kirito? He usually spends his time learning how to cook... after all, breakfast usually..." Sachi’s face suddenly turned bright red at this point.

"No, that's not it! It’s not what you think!" Sachi waved her hands in a panic.

"Is it... not... that?" Lancer intentionally drew out the sound.

"Lancer!" To break the awkward silence, Sachi hurried to open the door, opting to ignore Lancer’s teasing for the time being.

"Click—" As soon as Sachi opened the door, she stepped aside and signaled for Lancer and Asuna to enter.

"Smack!" Lancer covered his face, speechless. Asuna had entered first, and Lancer, wanting to show off his gentlemanly manners, had bowed to Sachi.

Sachi, having learned from Kirito that Lancer was of noble birth, didn't find it strange and walked inside. However, just as Lancer went to close the door, he found Asuna and Sachi standing completely frozen in front of him.

"Let me explain!" Kirito looked at the two girls frozen at the doorway and the scoundrel friend behind them; he knew that even if there was nothing going on, this incident was going to turn into a major problem.

"So, Kirito," Lancer crouched beside him with a solemn expression, looking at him with sincere eyes. "Trust me, kid, I won't look down on you. You must realize that there is a race in this world known as 'Lolicon,' and groups that are written as 'gentlemen' but read as 'hentai'." He paused to gather his emotions for a final statement. "I’ll help you file for an immigrant visa. Believe me, there is more than one place in this world where you can practice polygamy." Although Lancer’s expression and eyes were completely earnest, for some reason, Kirito felt like there was a small wing fluttering behind Lancer and a tail wagging back and forth.

"Lancer, can you be serious for once?" Having been thrown off by Lancer, the awkward atmosphere vanished. Sachi recovered from her shock, looking at Kirito with a complicated expression. "So, Kirito..."

"It’s not like that, Sachi! You have to believe me!" Kirito pleaded desperately.

After some time explaining, the three finally understood what had happened. While Sachi was out buying groceries, Kirito had gone for a walk. As this was a game map, it had become a habit for him to hunt for treasure chests or hidden secrets nearby. He had been wandering around when he found a young girl lying on the grass and carried her back. Just as he was about to cover her with a blanket, the others had burst in, leading to the scene they had witnessed.

"Alright, kid, I believe you. But if you want the others to believe you, you’ll need the girl’s testimony. So, I think the most important thing now is how to wake her up." Lancer didn't want to break them up; he certainly wouldn't admit that he was just trying to protect his own quest progress.

***

"You have a point. It doesn't seem to be a negative status effect; I called out to her for a while already. I suppose we’ll just have to wait. But Lancer, if I recall correctly, you’re not the type to visit without a reason. Tell me, what do you really want?" Kirito, seeing that Lancer—who loved to toy with him most—seemed to be backing off, decisively changed the subject.

"Well..." Lancer leaned back against the sofa. "I’ve just been feeling bored with grinding lately, so I came over to join the fun. As for the rest, you should ask Asuna." Lancer’s true motive wasn't so shallow; he was after the legendary S-rank ingredients! But he couldn't say that out loud; it would be too hard to explain later.

"Asuna, you wanted to see me? Is this about the strategy?" Kirito usually waited until Sachi was asleep at night to head to the front lines, so he wasn't very familiar with the progress of the dungeon clearing. Thinking about it now, it was indeed almost time to tackle the boss.

"That's right. Most of this floor’s dungeon has been explored. We should find the boss’s room within these next few days, so I’ve come to warn you to be prepared," Asuna explained.

"Kirito..." Upon hearing about the boss strategy, Sachi grabbed Kirito’s shoulders, completely ignoring the other "three" people nearby.

"Waaaah—" Just then, the girl woke up.

"Daddy!" The child’s first cry focused everyone’s attention on Kirito. But that was only the beginning—

"Mommy!"

"Pfft!" (All three)